


Do Me a Flavor

by maria_j_harper



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Addiction, F/M, Love Potion/Spell, Polyamory, Sexual Harrassment
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-04
Updated: 2014-08-04
Packaged: 2018-02-11 19:31:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2080389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maria_j_harper/pseuds/maria_j_harper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Karkat works at a magical ice cream shop where you'll instantly and completely fall into requited love for a day, based on which of the limitless flavors you choose. Terezi is this one customer who keeps trying to guess Karkat's flavor, and who Karkat is sincerely thinking about punching if she doesn't knock it off.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Do Me a Flavor

She's back. "I'll have one cone of lime sherbet, please." She says.  
"You know, not that it's any of my fucking business, but don't you think you should slow down? This is the fourth day, in a fucking row, that you've been in here."  
She shakes her head. "I'm Terezi Pyrope, I couldn't slow down if I wanted to!"  
She smiles at you with that shit-eating grin, red tinted shades glinting in the sun. You roll your eyes and serve her the ice cream. "Whatever," you say, "here."  
She savors the first lick of ice cream right there at the stand, and then turns around, only to bump into a girl in a cute little cat hat. "The mighty huntress is eternally sorry!" Says the girl.  
You see the magic at work, as they immediately hit it off, talking about roleplay, and sit down at a table in the shop. They're actually pretty cute together, not like yesterday, when she got rocky road and ironically got a guy in a wheel chair. That had just been weird.  
Still, you've seen enough of these one day whirlwind romances to be skeptical about their shelf life. Terezi seems too high stakes for the cutesy cat girl. She needs someone who can hold their own against her when she's acting ridiculous, who won't just go with whatever she says just because it's her saying it. Someone... like you?  
Don't be silly.

"Okay, that's it, who's your AA sponsor? I'm calling them, because clearly, you are an addict. You are addicted to ice cream, and love."  
"I'm not addicted! I can stop whenever I want! Now give me that blue raspberry goodness!"  
"Blue raspberry? Really? That's not even a real thing. I bet you'll get someone really weird with blue fucking raspberry."  
"What, like you? Will I get you if I eat the blue raspberry, Karkat?"  
"No!"  
"Really? What is your flavor then Kakles? Come on, you can tell me!"  
"Not if my life fucking depended on it. Here's your fake-flavored ice cream! Good luck with that!"  
The blue raspberry ice cream did indeed bring her someone weird, a snarky girl with a spider tattoo. The next day, you saw them fighting as Terezi entered the shop. Spiderbitch called her some pretty nasty names, and you couldn't help feeling rather protective.

"Let's see... you seem like... a boysenberry pie flavored kind of guy."  
"You need to stop this. I will fucking punch you, don't think I won't hit a girl. This is sexual harassment."  
"Ha! I'm getting closer, aren't I?"  
"Nope." You hand her a cone. "But here's your boysenberry pie ice cream. Why the fuck anyone would make ice cream out of something that's already a desert, I guess we'll never know."  
Today she falls in love with a juggelo. A fucking juggelo! What the literal fuck? She could do so much better than that joker!  
You think you might be a bit jealous.  
Oh god, they're making out!  
"Jesus Christ, if you're going to do that, don't do it in my sight! Get a fucking room!" you snarl.  
Okay, maybe a lot jealous.

"Chocolate. It's gotta be chocolate. Who doesn't like chocolate?"  
"For your information, blind girl, liking has nothing to do with it. I hate my flavor! And no, it isn't chocolate. There, I saved you two seventy five."  
"What happens if I get a double scoop?"  
"A perfect poly-amorous relationship that only lasts a day," you say flatly.  
She got mint chocolate chip and lavender ice cream, and apparently the two girls she took home with her stayed together, even after she broke it off.

She's stopped coming as frequently, and you're not sure whether to be happy or sad. on one hand, maybe she's gotten counseling for her love addiction, and that's a good thing. On the other hand, you miss seeing her every day.  
When she does come in, your heart speeds up, and because she can't see it you break out into a huge grin.  
"What'll it be today?" you ask.  
She shrugs. "Surprise me."  
You hesitate, then nod. "Wait here a minute, I'll be right back." You walk into the back and serve up a cone of a discontinued flavor. It's in your employee contract that as long as you work here, your flavor is never served, but you know what? Fuck them. You come back to the counter. "Here."  
She tastes it. "What is this? I don't think I've had it before."  
"It's raspberry sorbet."  
She smiles. "It's so decadent! I think it might be my favorite flavor so far! It's weird though, usually there's this pull, the magic I guess, making sure I meet the person I'm in love with. Are you sure it's working? Because with this ice cream, I don't feel any different."  
"Yeah, I don't feel any different either."  
Her brow furrows in confusion, but then realization dawns, and she breaks out into a big grin. Then she leans across the counter and she kisses you. Or she tries. Her mouth smashes into your nose instead.  
You stifle a laugh. "My lips are down here, you crazy blind chick."  
You kiss her lips gently, and you don't need magic ice cream to fall head over heels for this girl, because you already have.


End file.
